Thick fog rolls lazily across the murky swamp, swirling around long-dead tree stumps and long-dead warriors alike, concealing them from their enemy, their prey – their meal. Yes, it will be a grand feast–

“Hey, where are the decks?!”

Oh, right! My bad. Say, what am I doing here, writing about decks, anyway? Aren’t I that creepy Dungeon of Malefict guy? Well, yeah, and today, I’ll be making a few decks based around some of Time Spiral’s legends, as a counterpart to Ghurhgs' more informative article. But they will not be just any decks, no, they'll be flavorful decks! After all, what are legends but creatures packed with flavor?

What makes Lim-Dûl, Lim-Dûl?

That’s the great thing about these guys. Even though they have the bad habit of committing suicide when they look in a mirror (especially that Kokusho, in which case it’s probably not so bad), each card is filled to the brim with graphic scenes, epic battles, and entire stories – all in the palm of your hand. To begin, take Lim-Dûl. Lots of people like Lim-Dûl, but why? He didn’t even get his own card until Time Spiral! And his story was back in the Ice Age days. That's just cold. But now that he does have a card… it ain’t that great. But people still like him. Why, why this madness?!

It's because he tried to take over the world!

Do you see any ole necromancer doing that? I think not. Just look at these other losers, Apprentice Necromancer and Doomed Necromancer. Pfft, they kill themselves to raise one creature! But Lim-Dûl over here, he had himself an entire army of undead, denied death numerous times himself, and threatened the entire plane of Dominaria. That makes for a nice resume, if I do say so myself.

That said; I believe it’s about time to get on to our first deck, which features (you guessed it) Lim-Dûl, the Necromancer. To keep it in style, the theme is going to be “Zombies Take Over the World!!” in pure black; the way it should be. I’ll keep this deck Standard, as many of the older Lim-Dûl-related cards, well… suck, and we don’t need those to keep the flavor. Nope, Lim-Dûl came back in some time vortex to this blasted world and he’s going to have to deal with what we got.

Of course, we’ll need an army for our necromancer of choice, preferably a kind that never dies. Zombies, Nether Traitors, and even another necromancer to help our star along: Lord of the Undead. Lim-Dûl can only raise the opponent’s army to do his bidding, so this guy can help keep your own creatures coming back over and over, and can boost them (and the ones you’ve stolen) at the same time. For the expendable troops themselves, how about Stromgald Crusader, Festering Goblin, and Nantuko Husk. We have the power to return these guys repeatedly, and the Goblin and Husk take advantage of that.

And what’s a necromancy deck without some of your own necromancy? Zombify, Dread Return, and a single Living End (for kicks) give you the power, and for an added, special touch – Macabre Waltz. In the early stages of the game, you’re bound to lose a couple little guys (heck, you want to with Festering Goblin). So return them, and drop Lim-Dûl in the grave. Next turn, Zombify him! Though just in case he isn’t around to be discarded, I’ll add in a couple Avatar of Woes for good measure. Fill those graves, baby, fill 'em good.

With all these things bringing the dead back to life, we better make sure we have some dead to bring back. So Stinkweed Imp is in for his great dredging power, and added ability to kill things. Speaking of killing things, we need more! Four Seal of Dooms to finish it off and here’s the finished deck:

Lim-Dûl did come from Ice Age times, so it’s only fitting that the lands be Snow-Covered, and Mouth of Ronom adds a little extra creature removal.

With all the “free” removal in this deck, though, Lim-Dûl should be able to raise himself a mighty fine army and take over the world in no time! Seal of Doom, the Imp, the Husk, and Avatar of Woe all do a good job of killing off creatures for Lim-Dûl without one bit of mana. And since your little guys simply refuse to die, they should be able to hold a good defense if need be until the big guns come out. More likely, they’ll attack like the mindless zombies they are, moaning “Braaaaaaaiiiiinss!!” and dancing a Macabre Waltz all the while.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Sylar comes to mind...

Mmm, Braaaiiins…

Y’know the only thing better than eating brains? If so, please tell me in the message boards because I have no idea. But I will tell you that picking them is also quite fun, as well as fulfilling! If you’re the type of person who enjoys making others suffer, that is. And I know I am, which is why one of my favorite legends of all time is Braids.

But how she has changed in Planar Chaos! No longer is she a reckless, insane, dementia summoner; now she’s a cold, calculating… normal summoner. She who once rode a league-long death wurm across a battlefield, whooping and hollering with joy, is now more likely to be found at a library... studying. But there must still be some similarities! Without a storyline to go by, I would guess the alternate Braids is just as tricky as the original, if not more so. Just look at her face:

Such a cute face. But what is she saying? It’s hard to tell. It could be, “What are you lookin’ at?” or, “Oh? Is that all?” or, “Just try me” or, “Ha, you don’t stand a chance.” Slightly arrogant, definitely confident, and perhaps a bit crafty as well. Judging by her ability, I would say she is for sure crafty. “Go ahead,” she says, “Make your best move.” She’s taunting you, and you give in, laying down your best creature, a smirk on your face. Without any facial expression, she responds with Duplicant. Your best threat is gone, and now she has it. Ha! Brilliant!

And that is what this next deck is all about. Deceit, trickery, and loads of unexpected fun. Of all the decks I’m making here, this is by far my favorite. It greatly utilizes cards like Duplicant, though in many different forms. Dimir Doppelganger, Clone, Spawnbroker, and even Mindleech Mass all help this idea along. It’s the Kung-Fu Master of decks, turning your opponent’s strengths against them.

You may be wondering about Spawnbroker. I can’t very easily steal the opponent’s best creature with a 1/1, can I? That is where Ovinize and Serendib Sorcerer come in. With one of these cards, Spawnbroker basically reads: “Take any creature you want and give them this piece of crap in return.” They also make nearly anything very easily destroyed. Akroma getting on your nerves? (We know how those women can be.) Darksteel Colossus keeping you down? With Ovinize, the answers to all of your problems are just a ping away! Paired with Midnight Charm, even the indestructible goliath, when transformed into a puffy little sheep, is no match for one damage (and you gain a life doing it too!). Not only that, but it gives your copies an edge over the originals with first strike. One minute, it's roaring and stomping across the battlefield. The next *poof*, where'd he go? "Baaaah!" Hey, a sheep! Let's go kick it! *thwack, sheep falls over dead* Ah, good times.

But moving on - just to make sure your opponent doesn’t get anything good, I’ll include both Mesmeric Fiend and Blackmail (both nods to the original Braids) to make sure I’m the only one pulling the tricks. Premature Burial will work wonders against those huge guys the opponent just put into play for me to copy as well. And oh, some extra cards sure would be nice to make sure we’re nice and loaded up with fatties. Pain's Reward is cheap, and gets four cards. So what about the loss of life? You won’t be needing it!

Now let’s see what kind of mess we’ve made for ourselves (and this is Extended-legal, by the way):

I get evil ideas galore just looking at this deck. Though I have one final note for the sideboard; this deck relies much on what the opponent does, more specifically, their fatties. If they don’t have any, it could be a problem. Echoing Decay (flavor in the flavor ), the dementia summoner Braids, and Sudden Spoiling can help take care of swarms of little useless creatures. The Gargoyle is there for any nasty creatureless decks that don’t want to play your little games, and Dispersal Shield is a creative little counterspell that works well with the alternate Braids if you ever go up against a card Mindleech Mass can’t take care of.

Well folks, that was fun! I believe that’s all the time we have for toda—

What? You say I haven't gone on enough? I gave you two whole decks, with both of the colors showcased this time around. There's no deck with White cards, you say? Ok… what’s your point? Come on, White sucks. You don’t want to see any of that crap, trust me. Just look at the legends. You have some guy that’s racist against Goblins, an alternate “good” (aka junk) version of one of the great Evincars (honestly, what’s cooler: A shark-toothed, über-powerful vampire enhanced by Yawgmoth Himself, or some righteous dude who runs from a fight?), and someone who ended up imprisoned while looking for help. How weak is that?

Bah, well, since you’ve been good and put up with me this long, I suppose I can go with one more. Ok?

Lockdown

We’ve all been there. Or at least some of us. Stuck somewhere, can’t do a thing, so completely and utterly bored we wish the world would end just so something’s going on. Yeah, it’s the lockdown. Whether in school or Magic, it’s basically the same. When you’re inside it, it’s nothing short of hell. But when you’re on the outside, it’s slightly humorous. “Look at poor little Timmy, trapped in that cage. Haha.” And that’s about all it amounts to - perhaps poking Timmy with a stick as well, if there's one available. Administering a lockdown isn’t always fun, but there’s just something enticing about beating down a completely helpless opponent for laughs.

Inspired by Mangara of Corondor, the idea of this next deck is to stay out of that cage, and put your opponent in it. Can anyone guess how, without scrolling down? Anyone? …Bueler? …Bueler?

Ok, I’ll give you a hint. What does your opponent play with? No, not himself, with the game. Focus. Mind out of the gutter. Look at me and not that pretty girl you wish you could be with but don’t have a chance with in real life. It ain’t gonna happen, sorry. Now what’s the answer? Cards, yes. And what happens when you take them away? Oh noes, he can’t play anymore. That is what this deck does.

As I’m sure many of you know, Mangara has a little wording quirk that makes him especially useful. The part that reads, “Remove Mangara from the game” comes after the colon (the punctuation mark :/), which means it is not part of the cost, which means it does not have to happen for the rest of the effect to happen, which means if you play his ability, and in response play something like Momentary Blink, you can remove (nearly) any permanent from the game you wish and Mangara will be ready to do it again. Sweet, eh?

From here on out, I’m going to take bits and pieces from Chris Millar’s deck “Blink of Disaster” (found in the MDV Deck Database here). So if you see any suspicious similarities arise, that would be why.

Now unfortunately, Mangara’s ability alone won’t be enough to ensure a lockdown. We’ll need something more powerful for that. Something that can bring the game to a screeching halt. Something with… cute feathery flying animals... ones that symbolize love and peace... hm... aha! Doves! Dovescape will counter any non-creature spell that comes your way, and give them cute feathery flying animals symbolizing love and peace instead. What to do with those cute feathery flying animals symbolizing love and peace? You can either blow them all up with something like Sunscour, or just make them not attack. Blazing Archon works wonders here. And, to borrow Chris Millar’s genius, I’ll add Pull from Eternity and Resurrection to make the Sunscour more playable, and the Archon much more affordable.

A combo with that many cards means lots of card draw, so I’ll add some of both Careful Consideration and Compulsive Research. Yeesh, lots of pricey cards, eh? Azorius Signet will help with that. And, of course, Momentary Blink is going in to make Mangara extra useful. This leaves me pretty tight on cards, and I still have no win condition, so let’s add some style to this boring deck and top off the flavor with a single indestructible voodoo doll. How's that flavorful? Remember the part about poking Timmy with a stick? Well, this guy... thing... will ping the opponent to death while they rack up creatures that will never be able to attack - stuck in a cage as they are. Sound good? Thought so:

Theoretically, this deck should work. (Theoretically, I say, because it’s untested. The excessive White cards burn my hands.) Once you get Dovescape and the Archon, you’re pretty much untouchable. Any burn coming your way will swiftly be turned into flocks of harmless birdies, as will creature removal, discard, or any spell, really. If any permanent already in play is causing you trouble, use Mangara (and if there aren’t any, just get rid of those pesky lands). If creatures are a problem for whatever reason, Sunscour will cleanse them away for you. And, while you make sure the opponent stays locked in their little prison, Stuffy Doll kills them one damage at a time. Fitting, isn’t it?

I get this mental picture of having a cute little monkey in a cage (Timmy already died), and poking it with a stick over and over and over until it dies. Blood pooling out of it one drop at a time atop Timmy's remains while it tries to fight back in vain, snapping at the bars, people surrounding the cage giggling at its helplessness... gruesome, yes - almost nightmareish - but it is quite similar.

And now that I've imbedded that lovely image into your minds, I believe now is as good a time as ever to bid you adieu and goodnight.

~Maleficent~

P.S. Itching to know more about these legends and what makes them so great? Hop on over to the Flip-Side of this article where Ghurhgs goes in depth on all the Black, Blue, and White legends of Time Spiral.

Maleficent, author of The Dungeon of Malefict, is Praetor of The [Order] of Phyrexia, and speaks for Yawgmoth Himself. He hopes to spread the word of The Ineffable and all his greatness far and wide, so that more may learn of his wisdom and be accepted into his good graces.
He also likes to spend his free time slaying the unworthy in a variety of gruesome and agonizing ways, recurring the corpses, and doing it all over again.

You can discuss this article in the MDV forums here.
Find other articles by this author here.
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Articles Spotlights from 2007:
Lorwyn Theme Week Intro & Schedule of Events
Blink And Bounce: Timing is Key
Going Blind: XCB Metagaming - A Prolonged Conclusion.
The Science of Magic: Genetic Engineering, Part Two.
Shifting Lineaments: Casual Metagaming (Pt. 2).
The Dungeon Of Malefict: Pure Evil!
Land Week Introduction & Schedule.
Combofusion: Legends Timeshifted.
One Card to Rule Them All: Coastal Piracy
Irrational Love: Chimeras. The Lego's of Magic.